i feel like im losing him

Had a dream last night. But i dunno the person, but in my dream she was call yan ling. And this yan ling better don come into my dream again. If i saw her in my dream again, i will kill her. And if she really exist better don get near me or my loved ones, i will beat her like hell. I mean it. Owl is still emoing now. Cos a lot of stuff i din get my answer. No words of comfort. And this really explain a lot to me.. Dunno wad to say. Haix. I think i'm turning bck to last tym de me. Solitude, cool, don like to talk much. My world just come crashing down like that. I need somebody to pull me away from that world of mine. My effort of changing to a cheerful, outspoken person is gg to be wasted. But one thing i want to change is that i want to be like last tym when with precious, i will just shout in the mrt like crazy, nobody to stop me, i can shout wadeva i want, be loud person. nobody to refrain me from shouting and do wad i want in the mrt, it just feel so great.. They really bring back a lot of happy memories..


he still dunno wad i meant.. i stayed up is not waiting for him to say sry to me and be guilty. this is nt i want. and other stuff, i wld rather he don send me that msg, i will just think its unfair and be sian diao..haix.
im gg back to my lala land again.. nitex..