damn shag

I am so damn shag. My dark cirlces become darker and darker. And wrinkle started to appear under neath my eyes. I totally look like i aging already. I am going to become like liang po po like that liao. Friends had been asking me to sleep early. But i cant. At home, i tend to drag time. So when i finished all my stuff it will be quite late already. Just like just now. I drag drag drag till i doze off. Then wake up, realise time had passes so quickly, but did not sense any urgency in it. I am totally like a snail too liao. Do things all so slow.
Today after school, I finally redraw my circuit drawing, then I redo my maths tutorial worksheet. Then also do a bit of ae tutorial too. But it aint enough. There are still other module which i haven even touch yet. I got 2 projects now. Computer programming and AE project. Then got upcoming equizes and test too. What a hectic week. Argh!! There is not enough time. I wish time moved slower while i rush all these stuff in these slowed time. But i know that its not possible.
Other students are having their holidays now, but me.. still mugging in school. My holiday is just a study break for exam. Not really a holiday which i can play till i forget to go home. Must chiong studies in these 2 weeks of "holiday"..
Daryl lend me his comics books. Haha. I was readng it and haha.. I bang straight into the pole. Lol. But the book saved me.. The book hit the pole first which startled me, then i realise without the book, i would really have gotten a flat nose.. Lol.
Then several days back, when i was going home, i saw a lady infront of me, not moving at all. While i crept closer behind her, she turned and looked at me. Then i just walked. Then she walked beside me. I walked fast, she also walked fast. I slowed down, she also slowed down. Do you know why? Cause there is a rat in front. Thats why she was not moving. Till she met me, which i think what she was thinking at that time was " Heng ar, finally gt people walked past here". Then used me as a shield so that the rat wont run into her. Haha..lol. I was giggling at her reaction. Haha. I know it sounded bad, but i cant help it. Its too hilarious.
Then yesterday saw one video. Which till now, i wil burst out into laughter once i think of it. Haha..Lol. Daryl should know.. Cause i got the video from him one. Haha..Lol.

Let fate takes it time

Yesterday after school, went to the library to do the comm skill. Then after that went to tampines to meet karen and daryl, to wish farhana birthday. Then when daryl called me, then i know benny got come. Then i was like sian already. But lucky reach there liao, he left. Then after the celebration actually want go buy beer.. But tampines got a lot of people, so we went compass buy. Then daryl cannot pass. Then never mind lor. Then juan hui came. Then we went around to see which shop can buy. Cause i was very down and moody that day, the only thing i can think of is to drown my sorrows. Then i suggested to go to the kou fu there de prime mart near compassvale primary. Then in the end, keep dragging. Me and juan hui already pek chek, then we buy soft drink. Then i bought 2 cans of pepsi. Karen and daryl went off first. Then left me and juan hui. We went to the bus stop to wait fo bus. Then on the bus, we bump into kar hao. Kar hao treated us beer. Thanks man. I realised it's not only me who is down. Juan hui also down becos of family prob. Then kar hao down becos of relationships. Three sad people drink like hell in the end, as we drink we talked about our sad stuff and the stuff which bothering us. Drink drink, till my face very red. Then they suggested sending me home, but told them no need cos i never drunk.. Just that my face only red. Kar hao said that next time want bring me and juan hui out during holidays. Now i try not to think of the question already. I dont wish to ask my heart already. Cos really my heart had long been dead. I give up already.
Then today very sorry to juan hui, cos last minute everybody cannot make it, then left me. I went to woodland to meet juan hui, went back cvss. But the school almost empty. Juan hui chatted with on teacher then go off le. Then meet out at 6pm. Then i went to hougang mall with juan hui to eat Then walk walk around. I treated her bubble tea. Then we went to seng kang cc to chat. Then intended to set off to take bus at 9.15pm. but who knows we chateed till 9.45pm. Lol. But really we long time never chat for so long already. Its like reunion like that. But really feel guilty. i thought can make her happy, cos she upset about her family. But in the end did not do much.. But hope she gt cheer up by my lame jokes. Lol.

sigh

On saturday, went to kbox with karen.. Then we sang sad songs. Then the ambience like very down. Lucky here come daryl. He sang a more happy and high song which sort of lifted up the mood.. Then we were like high, keep jumping.. ANd instead of singing, we shouted. Lol. Then after that went to heeren, then went to far east.. I bought one earring. Then I bought one top.. Lol. Then after that we realise it one hours journey to pasir ris, so we never go to the bbq.. We went plaza sing outside drink beer.. Lol.. Then went back to punggol. Then i go meet up woth juan hui, then we chatted. Then after that i went around punggol.. Cause i think too early go home liao..lol.. I am planning for tuesday juan hui bdae celebration.. Hope it turns out well. And last stop will be at plaza sing again, drink .... Lol.. Now after tat dream, i more afraid that i will fall deeper liao.. Sigh.. Die die die.. What am i going to do..

Him*

Vikinesh called me punk mature and daryl said that I looked like punk and ah lian.. I was like -_-.. I looked like meh? Dotz.. I wear like punk meh? Diao.. Today maths test was a total goner siia. 15 marks just fly away like that. Sian.. All because of the R method. I want to assasinate R method. haha. Today esther gavce me a gift again.. Lol.. After karen left, i went to slack with esther and daryl.. Today i used up all my money. Then i no money to eat dinner all these. Sobx.. Then daryl treat me and esther drink bubble tea.. Lucky man, or else i can die of thirst.. My lips were already cracking like hell. Lol.. After daryl and esther left, i went to seng kang cc to revise.. But after few mins, I found myself dozing off. Then I had no choice but to go home.. Sian. I don want so early go home one.. I now thinking what song to sing on saturday.. LOL.. I want to wash my pig.. And my friends keep mistaking my pig key chain as a hippo!! Lol. Its a pig.!! haha..

Maths test!!

Finally my blogger back to normal... Getting more shag day by day.. I want to sleep early, but time just wouldnt allow me.. Today went to far east with alina, vikinesh, zi liang and khairil.. then saw some clothes that i want to buy.. The shirt from bus stop, and other shops.. Then the dress frm clark quay.. Then i also want go buy top at bugis.. This saturday going k lunch, then go buy top then go jo bbq liao.. Then before we head for esplanade, alina left. Then me, zi liang, vikinesh and khairil went to the library.. Then we revised maths..Now i know how to do liao.. I think i will pass my maths tomorrow.. Now going to study phase shift all these.. Tomorrow going to school early to meet vikinesh they all and revise maths.. lol.. I am going to pass maths.. I don want to fail maths...LOl..

I just got stung by a bee.. Damn!! See tomorrow still got swollen a not, if yes, i will go consult doc.. Sian very tired. yawn*.. i don feel like going to school.. I want to sleep.. lol.. today very early reach school siia.. Also don know why..Then the whole day i was shivering. cause it was so damn cold.. Brrr... I regret not bringing my jacket.. Then today forget to bring my lab paper.. This week is a unlucky day for me.. I just saw one dress, then i tried it on.. Very nice..I think i going to buy it.. it cost about ard $35.. lol..

I am happy that my mother like those flowers.. Lol. No more cake but flowers.. Lol. Now have to worry about father day.. lol..
Poly life is so damn hectic. Project!! E quizes.!! Now this coming thursday got maths test. Wonder how am i going to cope.. Some more now I am tutoring my god sis maths.. I am so shag.. Then tomorrow going to my godsis house again to tutor maths paper 2.. How i wish i can just drop dead.. Lucky i never take up any cca already. But vikinesh said that if i want go university, it's better to have a cca to back up the gpa. Unless i can score well, then i can no need join any cca. Darn!! If like that i have to realy study damn damn hard.. I am so stress up.. But can only bottomed myself or just rant in the blog.. Cos I dont want to give my friends another matter to ponder on.. And i will not break down this time, i will be strong. Owl will be strong for her future and her dreams.. She is keeping her dreams alive in her heart and mind.. Just did my physics and maths equiz. And for the first physics, i got 60.. Then the second equiz i got 70. I am slowly improving.. Then for maths i got 70.. I am trying to score better.. I am quite piss off with the ae project teacher, never even tell us how to connect the relay all these, while other group's teacher did.. Lucky vikinesh taught us(6 ppl).. Or else we will be lost some where in the deep deep jungle.. And i finally dare to ask question about studies, and is a lot of qns that type. Last time de me, i think will only ask a few qns, then if i still don know, i wont ask further.. But now i wil ask till i clear my doubts. Although it's a good thing, but i just hope my friend don mind me being irritating.. Now althought i played hard, but i also study hard, not so hard la.. Lol.. but I did revise.. But i guess i will be revising alone at seng kang cc there.. Cause I have no mood to study at home.. Although i will be alone in this path, but i dont mind, as long don ask me to go home and study can le.. I can see all my classmates are working very hard..They are really setting up a good example to me..They are the leaders, while i am the follower.. Wonder how karen did for her napha. hmm.. I have utmost faith in her that she can do it..But heard that she is not back home yet. Now my turn to say bout her..
To:karen:
you asked me to sms if i am going home late so as not to let anybody worry.. But now you switched off your hp.. Then your mother, me and daryl are all worried.. you also cannot like that one.. if you see this, sms me to report that you are safe and sound.. okay? and i am looking forward to this saturday bbq and k box..
Now i really wonder whether he did view my blog.. I am scared but yet... i dont know how to explain.. Mixed feelings..Sigh.. I just hope i dont fall in deeper where by i cant pull myself up.. But actually i now like a dead person with no feelings towards love.. And i dont know what is love anymore.. Really brooding over what alina said to me.. Sigh..

I really felt better after crying out.. Thanks to him who lent me his listening ear..Now i feel more relaxed.. I decide not to take up any cca le.. So tat I got more time to study and catch up with school work. Lol. Few days back, the dancing teacher locked me and my friends in the lab.. But haha, my friend very clever unlocked from inside, yeah and we are free.. haha.. Cher, find a better lock next time. Lol.. I like the dancing teacher, whenever in his class, i wont feel like sleeping.. haha.. He look very stern one, but he talked very funny.. haha.. Imagine the expression.. lol.. And some of my classmates are still discussing about whether he is wearing a fake hair..=x.. I am now coping well with elep, engsci,comm skill, physics..AE is a no no no no no for me!!! Shoo!! haha..lol.. Oh ya, happy burfdae to ah seng.. lol.. A bit sorry that i never go celebrate, cos i no$$$.. I am broke.. So now i eat very little, then at home, haha, chiong eat ar.. lol.. I want go k box and play pool soon.. my hand and my throat very itchy liao. haha..lol.. but of course mus save $$ first.. Now my top priorities is new earring and i want bubble dress..Sian, tmr i got to do my maths equiz.. Die liao.. sure fail.. haha. perhaps perhaps.. lol.. got to add oil... I want to rant!! N70 hp is so sucky!! Ewww.. So fast no batt one, then drop one time, hp got prob liao.. No good.. I want change.. lol.. My mei mei now preparing for maths paper one. Hope she can pass.. Lol.. going to tutor her for maths paper 2 soon.. Cos i don wan her to be in my footstep.. Some more her class de cher very dumb one..Every thing also don know. I want be principal, then fire him.. Lol.. Today i just revised finished my programming.. Haha..lol. now i think i should be able to cope well with tat module.. lol.. Today very surprising siia.. Nobody in my family except my bro knows that i am home.. Althought my mother got call me when i am in the bus, but i feel so happy.. Nobody nag at me.Haha.. lol.. Tmr pei my bro to pierce his ear.. Should i pierce one more hole too?? If yes, which part of the ear? Of cus not the bone, later my ear become like don know what shape, totally deformed.. Gross!! Sia la.. my stomach growling liao.. but i lazy go cook instant noodles.. I want order mac but later ding dong on the door bell, next thing is see very scary face in front of me.. Boo~. lol..

I am now suppressing my emotions.. I dont know what is the matter with me.. But I jus did a grave mistake which is lying.. I told him that i am okay.. Just that i am tired.. The truth is yes, im tired but i am not okay.. I feel very stress till i feel like crying out.. I told him i going home, but in fact, i went to the sengkang cc to take a breather and look at the ae. Look at the book, i feel like i am very dumb, why must i sleep in class, now i cant understand a thing.. Last time i keep saying i will pay attention in class, i will work hard, but in the end, i still like that. then after that i went to prime mart de playground there and sit down.. trying to calm myself down.. then i concluded that i cannot stay like this liao, i really must do something about it..maybe i not taking up any cca already.. Cos i really cant take it.. hope he forgive me.. sigh..

These few days, i met some great friends. They are really friendly. These few days slacked with them. They are really a bunch of cool guys.. lol.. Today my mother asked me how's my poly life.. Of course my answer would be tough.. But i will perservere..But i don know what the matter with me since last few weeks, i had been dozing off in class especially lecture.. oh my, owl is in trouble.haha.. lol...

Once again, and still the same.. Blogger problem. i wonder is really blogger problem or my laptop problem.. Today very hungry siia. I never eat breakfast as usual. My lunch= bread plus one bowl of raddish soup. Damn pathetic.. Hope dinner will be more sumptous or else i will go da bao liao.. speaking of da bao, yesterday my takeaway kena eatne by my mother, then i have to cook instant noodles with EGG.. lol..Mummy, next time i will also pinch your food liao.. haha..lol..beware... haha.. lol. Mother day coming.. Already ordered a cake liao.. but then like almost every year is cake, got nothing special leh. I was thinking of doing a mosiac mirror for her.. but where can i get those materials?? anybody can tell me?? lol.. I just delclared my discman r.i.p. You all must be wondering now what century liao, stil using discman.. Ai ya, i oso don wan de.. My mp3 spoil, then i go buy discman... now my discman spoil, i going get mp3.. haha.. lol.. Zen just released one new mp3, 1GB and it cost only 69.. and the colours are so nice,, the whole feature is so damn nice lor.. Considering to buy soon. Hah. But of course save money first.. lol.. Yesterday i got rather piss and irritated.. I already rejected him many time le, but he stil won understand.. Now he said he wan my pic to give to santa claus so that santa clau can make me to be his gf. Love cannot be forced de.. Why must like that..No matter how hard he tried, it just won work out one.. why can we just be good friends?? Sigh. Now no mood to study and do hmw liao..

There is something wrong with blogger.. cant customise my font colour.. Today went out to compass to activate my card and refund, then buy stuff, newspaper.. then after that intend to walk back home de.. cause i don want so early go home, but my leg still hurt, yesterday chat on the phone, then my leg acciddentally don know why, the bone pop out, but not out of the skin. And this time is left leg..but yesterday right leg also got. Now getting serious liao, walk will also pain. why i got a lot of inuries one.. Last time, i fracture my elbow, then one year later twisted my wrist, then secondary school hurt my left knee, then cannot walk too long.. then now both my right and left leg de toe there de bone become like that. Maybe i should stop doing sports already. But if really i stopped sports, then what can i excel in?? Sian.. Just got rant by my parents.. yeah, i will tolerate.. i want to change my temper... Owl is retiring already peeps.. owl is reverting to jus very normal jia hwei.. Cause owl cannot tahan the long ardous night already. Owl wants to break free..Owl is too weak too stress..

i am fading away..

Owl is fading away.Owl is falling sick. Now I everyday go school will sleep one.. very tired, but no choice.. Sian. My body immunity getting lower liao.. These days getting emo. But not so bad after all. Now i dont wish to go home so early.. Cus i don't like being at home. I miss my grandparents again. Haven got the time to visit them at uncle house. I also dont feel like joining cca already.. Now i just want to bury myself in books, keep ,myself occupied.. Hopefully tire myself out. I cant cope with the stress i'm having know. I never felt this stress b4.. It too much for me. I feel like dropping out of school already. But kar hao ask me perservere.. I dont think i can do it..

I am so happy.

I am finding you in a million of stars. I miss you greatly. Suddenly, I find time had pass so slowly so slowly that every minute is a torture to me. I miss your voice, I miss you presence in my life. Yesterday had finally pluck up the courage, to sms... At first i was giving up, then he replied, i was smiling all the way in physic lesson. I am so damn happy. I feel like i have wings at that moment. I want to soar high. Lol. I just want to hug him at that very moment. Lol. But i doubt there will be a happy ending.. So i dont dare to pin on high hopes. Lol. He was sick yesterday, never go to school. Lol. Yesterday i was suposed to meet my class at 8.30am. But in then end, i arrive at 7.40am. Then i sat down at the mrt.. I looked like a complete retard.lol In the bus i saw jairus and jessica.. Chatted with jessica till mrt, then separate. Today saw jia loon, jian hao at skul also.Lol. Great to see them.. Today is the class gathering.. Yeah. I am so looking forward to it. Tmr meeting cao yu and alina first at bugis to shop. Then ray will come meet us ,then shop a while then go meet the class at city hall..lol. I want to buy earring and a ring..

I am so happy.

I am finding you in a million of stars. I miss you greatly. Suddenly, I find time had pass so slowly so slowly that every minute is a torture to me. I miss your voice, I miss you presence in my life. Yesterday had finally pluck up the courage, to sms... At first i was giving up, then he replied, i was smiling all the way in physic lesson. I am so damn happy. I feel like i have wings at that moment. I want to soar high. Lol. I just want to hug him at that very moment. Lol. But i doubt there will be a happy ending.. So i dont dare to pin on high hopes. Lol. He was sick yesterday, never go to school. Lol. Yesterday i was suposed to meet my class at 8.30am. But in then end, i arrive at 7.40am. Then i sat down at the mrt.. I looked like a complete retard.lol In the bus i saw jairus and jessica.. Chatted with jessica till mrt, then separate. Today saw jia loon, jian hao at skul also.Lol. Great to see them.. Today is the class gathering.. Yeah. I am so looking forward to it. Tmr meeting cao yu and alina first at bugis to shop. Then ray will come meet us ,then shop a while then go meet the class at city hall..lol. I want to buy earring and a ring..